film

'FUCK IT' ENERGY... by Caroline Pool

‘Mum’ | 40x40in | Oil on canvas

This is another portrait from when I could only paint in my spare time. By this point I wasn’t taking full time art department jobs at the studios anymore but I was working from home doing any kind of film graphics and research friends passed onto me. Really grateful for that. For me, the film studio environment was not good for my mental health and the minute I took myself out of it, I felt like a weight had been lifted. Don’t get me wrong, it’s terrifying leaving job security and requires a huge amount of ‘fuck it’ energy, a supportive partner who knows exactly what you’re going through and constantly reminding myself that if I fail, it’s not the end of the world. Big sissypoo, Susie told me it’s not about what you do in life, it’s about how you want to be. Day to day. That’s always stuck with me plus her killer advice on a bulletproof five point paragraph breakdown of any argument for my A-Level English exam.

The way I painted back then was so different but that’s the whole point. I think it’s important to be constantly learning and evolving with techniques. learning how to fail quickly and then find another way. Still always start with the eyes though. Don’t think that will ever change.